Another Itch Update

Really? Seriously? IT'S NOT GONE YET. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me by dammit I am so sick and tired of this. I've been through two rounds of steroids which seem to not be doing a whole lot. I keep debating on whether or not to go back to the doctor or should I just resign to the fact that it's going to take my body awhile to get over. I go through times where I itch beyond belief, and then times like right now where I'm ok. We've even been wondering if something else is going on. I haven't changed soaps, shampoo, laundry detergent, lotion, or anything like that. Since I first noticed the poison ivy I've washed my sheets way more that I ever have. I feel like a leper.

Itch Update

I have noticed more poison ivy spots appear so I decided to go back to the doctor today. I said just say so if I was being impatient, but the doctor agreed that with my first round of steroids we'd hope no new spots would appear. She also did stress that I'm not contagious, and I'm not reinfecting myself, it's the allergens are still in my system and showing their ugly head. I've got another round of steroids to start after this round ends on Friday. I also have an antihistamine to help with the itchy, but the doc did warn me it may cause drowsiness. Yep, I feel it...tired and my head is fuzzy. But my legs are restless and jumpy. I feel like I'm being pulled into 2 different directions, and I am not liking this. Tired and restless, that is not cool!

Itchy & Scratchy

Last Monday I decided to trim back the English Ivy in our front yard. If we don't watch it it'll grow up onto the porch. After a walk, when I was all sweaty & nasty, I grabbed the hedge clippers and trimmed back the ivy. While I was out there I was attacked by mosquitoes, but apparently there was more. I thought all of the red spots I was seeing was just the bug bites, but bug bites don't spread like my spots were! Turns out I have something poison ivy-ish. I'm not 100% sure that it's poison ivy, which is okay because the treatment is pretty much the same. A steroid shot in the ass followed up by 6 days of steroid pills. I got the shot on Friday and started by pills on Saturday, and things are getting better, but I want it gone NOW. This sucks. It's on my left shin, on my right leg it's on the side and behind my knee in the bend. It's also on my neck and my chest. I've been reading some online things to help with the itch because my calamine lotion is doing jack shit. Apply acetone or nail polish with acetone in it...that burns. I imagine bleach would do the same thing. When I get hot it gets worse. Oh, and do you know what the doctor said to me - "Let your husband take care of the yardwork!"

Hrmph

Not in the mood to talk tonight. Soccer game sucked, I played awful. Then I burned my effing index finger on my right hand when making dinner. And to top it all off...I'm a little achy - like getting sick achy. Grr!

Baby Dreamin'

Had another pregnant dream last night. I don't remember a whole lot of it, but I do know that I was waiting for someone else's wedding to finish so that mine could begin. I just had to get married before my baby was born. As usual, I'm not sure who the baby daddy was, and it wasn't important. I'm not even sure if the father was the groom!

Guest House

Today I went along with the roommates while they went furniture shopping. There were a few things on their list, one being a new couch. Right now, downstairs in the basement, is my couch, chair, and coffee & end tables. I think those are the only things of mine that reside outside of my bedroom. It's perfect furniture if it's the 3 of us, but if we have company over there's not a lot of seating. Let's be honest, on a couch that has 3 cushions, it's really only comfy for two people, one on each end. My furniture will really not suffice when football season rolls around. I spent last fall living on the roommates' couch watching the games, and that's before we were roommates. And it was usually me plus at least one other person. The furniture we sat on back then is an awesome sectional that's in a different room in this house, not in the basement where the badass tv and surround sound are.

For me, the trip was a little depressing. I really do think it's because I use all of their stuff that this doesn't feel like home. And now I'm losing the one thing that's mine. That's not to say when the new furniture arrives we're completely getting rid of my stuff, but it's not going to be in a heavily used room. But it will be cast aside. Maybe "cast" is a harsh word. Moved aside, put aside, out of the way. Heck it might even end up in a storage unit.

I guess I should really be thinking about the deeper meaning of all of this...why is it so necessary that I have "my stuff" when I'm in a house that I'm constantly reminded is my home? The possessive feelings are on my side, not theirs. I guess if I'm really honest with myself it has to do with the lack of accomplishment in my life. A couch is all I have to show for it. At times, in every aspect of my life it feels like there's nothing but failure. Work, relationships, financial stability, hell, even my weight = failure. One would think that at my age I'd be doing something more that what boils down to an entry-level position. Especially considering the time I spent (wasted) on education. And with that entry-level position comes my entry-level salary. I'm practically living month-to-month on my paycheck, supporting no one but myself. At this point in my life shouldn't I be picking out furniture for my house? My own house that I don't even have. I can't afford to live in the area I want, not without selling vital organs and babies on the black market. Maybe that means I should change my wants. Start being realistic and quit this foolish day dreaming. I never thought things would be like this. That's not to say that things are all bad, just not the way I imagined them, and while it may seem like I'm saying everything is horrible, that's just how it feels at the moment, and it doesn't always feel like this.

A Marco Pic